A wedding toast is short: a minute or less, one thought about the couple, then glasses up. A speech is the longer version the wedding party gives.
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Every one under a minute, and each one from a different seat in the room.
Maddie has been borrowing my sweaters since she was six. I have never gotten one back. Not one. I'm Paige, her big sister. Marco, last month I saw my gray cardigan hanging in your closet, and I hear you wear it on weekends now. So that's it. You're family. You're in the system. Please raise your glasses to Maddie and Marco. Keep the sweater.
When I was sixteen, Owen taught me to drive stick in a church parking lot, and he yelled "Clutch!" about four hundred times. I still hear it at every red light. I'm Leo, his little brother. Anna, you drive stick better than he does. He told me so himself, which is the nicest thing I've ever heard him say about anyone's driving. Please raise your glasses to Anna and Owen. Clutch.
Twelve years ago, Kira and I stood in the wrong line at the DMV for two hours. By the time we found out, we were best friends, and neither of us had a license. I'm Mel. Kira, you've stood in a lot of lines with me since: concert tickets, airport security, my first apartment viewing at seven in the morning. Isaac, you're in the line now. It moves slower than you'd think, and it's worth every minute. To Kira and Isaac.
June's grandmother and I were married for sixty-one years, and people always asked us for the secret. She'd say, "Separate blankets." She wasn't joking. I'm Grandpa Ed. Here's what I actually learned: say good morning every morning, even on the bad ones. Especially on the bad ones. June, Oscar, I hope you get sixty-one years. Say good morning. And get the separate blankets. Please raise your glasses to June and Oscar.
Before anyone else talks, we want to say one thing. Look around this room. Some of you flew across three time zones. One of you drove here from Oregon with a cooler of salmon. Aunt Rita, you told us you'd never set foot in Ohio, and here you are. We're Lina and Arjun, and everything good about us, we learned from someone in this room. Thank you for today, and for everything before it. Please raise your glasses. To all of you.
Rafael has owed me forty dollars since 2016. Tonight, as my wedding gift, I'm officially forgiving the debt. Cass, you're welcome. I'm Brett. Rafael, I have never seen you this happy about anything, and that includes the day I lent you the forty dollars. To Cass and Rafael.
For all of fourth grade, my brother walked me to school, even though his school was the other way. He was late every single day that year, and he never told our parents why. I'm Rose, Jonah's little sister. Mara, he walks you everywhere now: to the car, to the door, across every parking lot. I've noticed. He's still going the long way to get you there. Please raise your glasses to Mara and Jonah.
When Alicia was eight, she married our dog in the backyard. I was the ring bearer. The ring was a Froot Loop. I'm Tony, her little brother, and I'll say this for Rufus: he took his vows very seriously. He never left her side for fourteen years. Grant, no pressure. Please raise your glasses to Alicia and Grant.
On the worst night of my life, I called Nia at three in the morning. She picked up on the first ring and said, "Where are you?" Not "What's wrong?" Where are you. She was there in twenty minutes. I'm Kelsey. Omar, last Christmas, when Nia's flight got canceled, you drove nine hours through the snow to bring her home. To Nia and Omar. Wherever you two end up, I'll be there in twenty minutes.
Swipe or use the arrows for the next one. Copy the one that sounds like you.
To the two people who make the rest of us believe in this. To Emma and Daniel.
“To the two people who make the rest of us believe in this. To Emma and Daniel.”
“Here's to a lifetime of ordinary Tuesdays, together. To Emma and Daniel.”
“Here's to a long marriage and a short toast. Cheers.”
“Emma, you found someone who laughs at your jokes. Daniel, keep practicing. To you both.”
“May you always argue about the thermostat and never about anything that matters. To Emma and Daniel.”
“To the couple who made everyone in this room travel a very long way. Worth it. To Emma and Daniel.”
“Daniel, welcome to the family. We're louder than we look. To Emma and Daniel.”
“To every road trip where you two still can't agree on the music. To Emma and Daniel.”
“May your coffee be strong and your arguments be short. Cheers, to Emma and Daniel.”
“Thank you for letting all of us be part of today. To Emma and Daniel.”
It asks you for one real story, and the words stay yours. Free.
Who are you to the couple?
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A few words said with a glass raised, ending with everyone drinking to the couple. A toast is short, a minute or less, and anyone the couple invites can give one. A speech is the longer version the wedding party usually gives, and it ends in a toast.
A minute or less on its own, which is under a hundred words out loud. If you're giving a full speech as the best man or maid of honor, that runs two to three minutes. Either way, shorter is kinder: nobody has ever complained that a toast ended too soon.
Say who you are to the couple in one line, tell one small story or detail about them, then raise your glass and name them both. Skip the thank-you list and the borrowed quote. One true thing, said plainly, is the whole toast.
At most American receptions the hosts, often the bride's parents, welcome everyone first, and the best man usually gives the first toast. The maid of honor follows, and parents, siblings, close friends or the couple themselves may add one. The couple being toasted doesn't drink to themselves.
Only if the couple has asked for it. If you'd like to say something, ask them a few weeks ahead so you can be slotted into the order. Standing up unannounced, especially late in the night, is the one way a toast can go wrong before you say a word.
Usually during dinner, once everyone is seated and glasses are filled, and sometimes just before the cake is cut. At a cocktail-style reception they often come right after the couple makes their entrance. Whoever runs the room, the planner or the DJ, will cue you.
Tell us who you are to them and one thing you remember. We’ll help you turn it into a short toast in your own words.
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